Giving & Taking Offence & the Habit of Creating Allowances for wrongs (2)
Good morning, brethren. Today, we continue with Part 2 of our teaching titled “Giving and taking offence and the habit of creating allowances for wrongs.” Last Sunday, we explored what it means to give and take offence. In this second part, we will focus on how to deal with offence when it happens and what it truly means to create allowances for wrongs — with biblical examples and practical steps for living it out. Our key scriptures remain Proverbs 19:11 “Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offence.” And Colossians 3:13 says “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” Ephesians 4:2–3; Romans 12:18. Consider these steps to deal with offence when it happens, confront the offender in love Matthew 18:15 says “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone.” Please kindly go directly to that brother or sister in humility and truth, avoiding gossiping about them. Secondly desire and seek reconciliation with the offender, Romans 12:8 says “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” This is because reconciliation is the goal of confrontation. Thirdly, as believers you must guard your heart from bitterness, forgiveness keeps the heart free while bitterness grows from unhealed offence. Proverbs 4:23 says “Above, all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”
A little nugget to reflect on, when Someone insults or misunderstands you - pause, pray, and respond gently (Proverbs 15:1). If you realise you hurt someone - apologise sincerely and make peace (Matthew 5:23–24). If you feel bitterness growing - please release the person in prayer and bless them (Romans 12:14). Offence is a test of love, humility, and maturity. To give offence can destroy other people’s faith. Also taking offence can destroy your own peace. As believers the cross should remind us that forgiveness is the way of Christ. Creating allowances for wrong means to make room for other people’s imperfections, it is to expect human weakness and respond with Godly grace. Please note that It is not excusing sin but choosing not to be enslaved by resentment. The bible in Colossians 3:13 says “Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you.” And Proverbs 10:12 says “Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offences.” As recipients of God’s divine allowance, we are called to extend the same to others (Psalm 103:8–10). Perhaps I should break down the words ‘creating allowance’, as believers please expect imperfections as people will obviously disappoint you, kindly interpret such disappoints in love (having good intentions within you), then prayerfully respond to the hurt by taking it to God in prayers and lastly forgive and make every attempt to forget. Creating allowances is not weakness, but it is spiritual strength. It shows maturity, humility, and the heart of Christ. When we make room for other’s shortcomings, we make room for God’s grace to work through us. A practical example to reflect on is often what happens in our churches or our families life, people will say or do things that hurt us. Instead of cutting them off or retaliating, God calls us to forbear — to remember that love is a journey, not a transaction. The story of Joseph and his brothers (Genesis 45:1–15), we read that Joseph’s brothers sold him into slavery, yet when he became Egypt’s Prime Minister, he chose to forgive his brothers over revenge. Genesis 50:20 says “You meant evil against me, but God meant it for good.” The lesson here is that Joseph made allowance by seeing God’s hand in human failure, he refused to hold on to bitterness. The story of Stephen and his persecutors in Acts 7:59–60 is another example of creating allowances for wrong.As Stephen was being stoned, he prayed, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them.”Even in suffering, Stephen reflected Christ’s forgiving spirit — creating allowance for those blinded by sin.
The reasons we should create allowances is because we ourselves also do fail sometimes (Matthew 7:3-5), it also helps us to maintain peace and unity, very importantly it help us reflects Jesus’s character (Philippines 2:5). In conclusion, when people will say and do things that hurt us, instead of cutting them off or retaliating, God calls us to forbear — to remember that love is a journey, not a transaction. Let us, therefore, choose the higher way — the way of love, forgiveness, and forbearance, for in doing so, we reflect the heart of Christ and keep our hearts free for God’s purposes. Proverbs 19:11 says “It is his glory to overlook an offence.” Service is for 10.30am and workers meeting is for 10am. God’s blessings - Mike